distant thoughts on catalunya

when we were in lisbon, the guys we met mentioned a dislike of barcelona (compared to madrid) that they said was linked to the city's "anarchist vibe." "you mean.. the catalan thing?" i asked, surprised by their reaction to what i was beginning to learn about the history of catalunya.

looking back, this "vibe," the catalan presence in barcelona, was one of my favorite things about the city. i think the history of catalan culture, so suppressed politically and linguistically under franco, plays a fascinating role in the way this city behaves. in my last few weeks in barcelona i kept thinking, i wonder what it means to speak this language that is not technically needed to communicate with anyone (i could be wrong, but i don't know that anyone only speaks catalan). what does it mean to speak and create in a language that exists for reasons other than use-value? to make the choice to communicate in catalan because it signifies a history is, i think, very important and very interesting. to resist what gloria anzaldua calls "linguistic terrorism" is very important, very interesting. this is a reason to study language and literature, there is a free-ing there.

adios y tal

today was sunshine and chicken sandwiches and last minute postcard souvenirs and passion fruit martinis and sushi and lovely catherine and 3am walk home with albert talking about barcelona and traveling and coming back and staying home. hasta luego, bcn; you've sure been swell.

sant jordi i el drac

yesterday was sant jordi's day, a very catalan holiday when all barcelona girls get roses from barcelona boys and boys get books from their girls. the whole city was packed like i've never seen it, and the streets are lined with roses of all kinds and books of all kinds for people to pick up along the way. kelly, tara and i got roses from the boys and found them these vintage catalan cookbooks for housewives. it was all very valentine's 2.0.

also, i know it makes me beyond boring, but i just want to go home. i have appreciated this opportunity so much but i am done.

or, dramatic change of plans:

staying in barcelona hostel for 7 nights until my flight back to the states. biggest bummer.

last hurrahs, etc..

(photos from catherine's camera. love these girls!)

más alla de aquí, etc...

i find it amazing how even when you know four months will go by fast, four months goes by and you wonder how they could have possibly gone by that fast. or how much things could stay so much the same. i am envious of people who study abroad and find a new self in their new place; i won´t pretend to feel that drastically changed by my own experience, although i have loved it here.

i had wished to feel somehow at least more mature, more independent, more a future, free-me by the time i left here, but i think i clearly just do not do well with the whole forward motion thing (i am allowing myself the small displacement of blame in this case that my time in barcelona did not exactly start off under the kind of circumstances that inspire moving away from the comfort of family or friendfamily). but i´m not sure i mind. i have learned about myself and as a mini-self test this studying abroad as taught me that yes, peace corps would be difficult and painful and yes, it will always be hard for me to "let go," but also that yes, i am always still me and as long as there is work for me to do and things for me to learn i will never be bored enough to be too lonely.

i am sad to leave barcelona, especially just as the city is starting to wake up from the winter. most of all, i will miss the language so much. i have loved speaking it every day and learning new words and listening to myself hold fluent (albeit short) conversations in this language i have been missing since i stopped speaking it so many years ago. i have loved the chance to watch NCIS in spanish, listen to the news in spanish, gossip in spanish, give directions in spanish, learn in spanish. loved loved loved.

i am also sad to leave churros y xocolata, pa amb tomaquet, paella wine siesta sundays, menta infusiones, metro people watching, walking everywhere all the time, doble mejilla besos, guapa guapa, sun shining off gaudi roofs, street musicians, traveling every weekend, bakeries, flower shops, spending days wandering and without hardly saying a word to anyone, the little man at the gym who calls me guapisima. but i am so glad to go home and i am so looking forward to san diego summer loveliness!!

finde

i have one weekend left in barcelona. this means:
1. demasie cafe for some adios xocolata
2. ciutadella parc
3. tibidabo
4. beach rollerblading
5. beach disco
6. get a grip
7. pack up life
8. thesis application
9. tutoring re-application

best of bcn post

some of my favorite favorite places to go (read: eat) in barcelona.

1. la boqueria. fresh fruit, fresh fruit juice, fresh everything, delicious.

2. demasié cafe. best xocolata i´ve had in spain, by far. also, adorable and also delicious. (photos via http://www.demasie.es/)

3. bar lobo. this super chic bar has the most amazing salads, whole wheat honey walnut bread, home-made pizzas and home-made coffee ice cream. loved.

barça barça baaaaarça

tomorrow semana santa starts and my family comes. i am so looking forward to warmer andalucian sunshine, flamenco, bull fighting, l'alhambra, moroccan shops, beach lounging. love and besos.

the first day of spring

nieve etc...

today it is snowing in barcelona (for the first time in 10 years, i heard). big wet sloppy snowflakes in my hair and in my cafe con leche and on the ground and in my shoes. i am such a california baby, but i just want it to be warm and sunny and mediterranean. wahh

sunshine lovely barceloona

casa mila (la pedrera)

also known as my continued love affair with antoni gaudi.

desarrollarse

it will be nice to just stay (more or less) in barcelona this weekend. i still don't feel like i have my head on straight.

euros, etc

things i will spend money on every month:

1. metro pass
2. dance class
3. cell phone
4. hot chocolate
5. jugs of crackers
6. going out
7. traveling
   

parc güell

 

 

 

 

today was lovely. very warm and very lovely. parc güell was filled with violin playing, steel drums, spanish songs, spanish dancing, palm trees, laughter and light. it felt like summer and it felt like spain and i was basically in heaven.

la sagrada familia

  

well, thanks gaudi

so this morning at around 5am barcelona time, kelly and i were mugged walking home. thankfully nothing was really taken but we were both grabbed violently from behind and since i (stupidly) fought back a little, i was thrown pretty hard onto the ground and hurt my head.

this is a reminder to myself and to all of you to be safe be safe be safe. love.

*update

t is supposed to snow here on saturday, according to weather.com. SNOW.

i literally do not know how to handle myself in this weather. (or, apparently, in this situation. distance is making me even more neurotic and push-pull-y than ever).

joan miro, you know how i feeeeelz.